No relationship is ever a waste of time, any time spent with someone who makes you feel happy is valuable. Whether or not a relationship ends in marriage or any other form of happily ever after is irrelevant.
Each relationship we come across teaches us something new about love, people, and even ourselves. Even if the people we date exit our lives forever, we hold on to the warm memories and painful truths we gained from those experiences.
It hurts when the relationship you have been invested in comes to an end. You gave it your all and even compromised and sacrificed so much of yourself to make it work. Yet things ended and you feel like you wasted your time.
Regardless of how things ended, whether on good terms or bad. It taught you what you won't put up with in your next relationship. There are flags that were ignored that if taken seriously would have probably saved you the heartache.
Every relationship before it ends has it signs of things going left, and when those signs are ignored they eventually explode. It's not so much the problems in the relationship as it is how much both partners want to make things work.
You can want to make things work and change certain things that will make the relationship flourish but if the other person is not fully invested into trying to make things work it becomes a waste of time.
Getting your heart broken is one of the worst pains you can experience, specially when your heart doesn't want to let go. You regret even putting yourself in a position to be heartbroken. You think to yourself: What a waste of time. What a waste of love.
But it wasn’t a waste. Time spent loving someone is never a waste because love can never be wasted. No matter where they end up, or where you end up, people never forget those who loved them.
When we are in a relationship we can either gain self-respect or lose it depending upon how we allow ourselves to be treated. Relationships are the best places to learn where and how we need to respect ourselves.
We learn that we do not do anyone any favors by allowing ourselves to be taken advantage of. We learn what our limits are and we act upon those limits by asserting ourselves when we have been hurt. Our relationships give us the arena to learn to act on our own behalf in an effort to step into our value.
Life is a process of beginnings and endings. Whenever a relationship ends we experience its loss. We tend to identify strongly with those we love, so when the relationship ends we have to get back to ourselves, deal with loneliness for a while and lean into those uncomfortable emotions. When we are in pain we are growing and this is what gets us more strongly identified as individuals.
Each loss in our life is meant to bring us into a closer relationship with ourselves and where we need to mature, grow, love ourselves and become more confident. As we take each relationship for what it is, we will see that the learning to come from each is invaluable as a mirror to learning about ourselves.